German Love Language: The Art of Romantic Conversations in German

BRUNHILD to DOG
So eine süße Maus bist du!
(You are such a cute mouse!)

Who doesn’t enjoy liebevolle Umgangsformen (tender modes of behavior)? Plus, everybody knows that being selbstbewusst (self-confident) and able to talk about our Gefühle (feelings) is sexy! So here we go, a video to teach us how to use German love language.

Ich bin Spring German Lehrerin Brunhild. Heute sprechen wir über die Liebe! (Today, we’ll talk about love!)

1. Arten der Liebe (Kinds of Love)

First of all, what kinds of love are there even? Well, if you ever have been verliebt (in love), you know this one:

• romantische Liebe (romantic love). Yes, this is the one we see in Hollywood movies. But when it goes wrong, it can lead to:
• Liebeskummer (heartache), which is the worst kind of
• Herzschmerz (heartache). A safer bet is:
• platonische Liebe (platonic love), we can feel this towards our friends. Another name for platonische Liebe is
• freundschaftliche Liebe (friendly love) – friendly love

VANADIS
Was ist los? Hast du Liebeskummer?
(What’s the matter? Are you lovesick?)

YLVIE
Ich bin in Max verliebt.
(I’m in love with Max.)

VANADIS
Das ist doch schön! Hast du ihm deine Liebe gestanden?
(That’s nice! Have you confessed your love to him?)

YLVIE
Ja. Er meinte, seine Zuneigung ist platonisch.
(Yes. He said his affection is platonic.)

VANADIS
Platonische Liebe ist auch etwas Schönes.
(Platonic love is also something beautiful.)

YLVIE
Er findet mich bestimmt dumm und hässlich!
(He surely thinks I’m stupid and ugly!)

VANADIS
Vielleicht solltest du erstmal an deiner Selbstliebe arbeiten.
(Maybe you should work on your self-love first.)

Platonic and romantic love have one thing in common. In both cases, you feel a strong

• Zuneigung (affection) towards the other person. Then there is also
• bedingungslose Liebe (unconditional love), which is what a mother feels towards her child, at least ideally. That is also a form of
• selbstlose Liebe (selfless love). And then there is the kind of love which I think everyone should have, and that is:
• Selbstliebe (self-love). Because who can love us if we don’t love ourselves?

YLVIE
Meinst du, ich habe einen Korb bekommen, weil ich mich selbst nicht liebe?
(Do you think I was turned down because I don’t love myself?)

CHUNK ALERT

einen Korb bekommen or einen Korb kriegen or (getting turned down, lit.: to receive a basket) is a phrase that means “to get rejected”. It literally means “to receive a basket”. What?!

This expression comes from the Middle Ages, when the Fräulein (damsel) would lower a basket from the tower window in order to then secretly pull her loved one up. However, if this was not welcome, the young lady would lower a basket with a broken bottom or no bottom. It is said that this later became the custom of ladies handing annoying admirers a little basket in order to show them symbolically: “***Dich ziehe ich nicht rauf!***” (I ain’t pulling you up!) I ain’t pulling you up!

Pss! For more funny chunks like “einen Korb kriegen” (getting rejected), feel free to download the link in the description. You’ll find our free essential German chunking kit which you’ll learn to talk like a native faster!

There are two ways of being verliebt (in love). To be glücklich verliebt (happily in love) and to be unglücklich verliebt (unhappily in love). We all have been on both receiving ends, haven’t we?

• Wenn wir einen Korb bekommen (When we’re being rejected), we are
• unglücklich verliebt (unhappily in love).
• Wenn unsere Liebe erwidert wird (When our love is being returned), we are
• glücklich verliebt (happily in love).

The girl in the dialogue was unglücklich verliebt (unhappily in love). She confessed her love to the boy and hat einen Korb bekommen (was rejected). But how did she confess her love then? Let’s have a look!

2. Liebesgeständnisse (love confessions)

BRUNHILD
Du bedeutest mir sehr viel.
(You mean a lot to me.)

CAT
Miau!
(Meow!)

Here are some ways of expressing your love:

• Du bedeutest mir sehr viel (You mean a lot to me). You could say this to anyone who means a lot to you.
• Was wäre ich ohne dich? (What would I be without you?): A phrase to let your partner or friend know that they complete you. If you want to step up the romance even further, you could say
• Wir sind füreinander bestimmt (We are meant for each other): But be careful with this one. You might wanna make sure that the affection is mutual, otherwise this one can come across very cheesy.

BRUNHILD to DOG
Wir sind füreinander bestimmt!
(We’re meant for each other!)

Here come three phrases, that I personally, if they come from the heart, appreciate very much:

• Für mich bist du perfekt, so wie du bist! (To me, you’re prefect the way you are!): Someone is accepting you with all your perks and flaws. This is what we all want, right? Of course, it may also mean that someone is wearing the rosarote Brille (pink glasses) and does not really see you for who you really are, but that’s just something you gotta investigate further then…
• Ich bin immer für dich da. (I’ll always be there for you.): This phrase has a nice touch of reliability, which is what it’s all about, isn’t it.

Now, if you really love someone and are ever so grateful for their existence, you could say

• Du bist das Beste, was mir je passiert ist.

BRUNHILD to BABY
Du bist das Beste, was mir je passiert ist.
(You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.)

But the simplest and clearest of all phrases still has to be: Ich liebe dich (I love you).

Now, to address our beloved, we most certainly need a romantic nickname, which we call Kosenamen (nickname).

3. Kosenamen (nicknames)

BRUNHILD to CAT
Mausi!
(Mousy!)

Now, to address our beloved, we most certainly need a romantic nickname, which we call Kosenamen (nickname). Here are the most popular ones related to animals:

• Schnecke (snail), which is mostly used for girls
• Hasi or Hase (bunny), which is mostly used for guys
• Mausi (mousy) or simply Maus (mouse), which is also used for girls

BRUNHILD to DOG
Du süße Maus!
(You sweet mouse!)

These were some animal-related nicknames, which are cute. But the classics are, however:

• Schatz (treasure)
• Liebling (darling)
• Süßer / Süße (sweetie)

DAISY
Hase, liebst du mich?
(Bunny, do you love me?)

HUSBAND
Natürlich, Mausi. Du bist mein allergrößter Schatz.
(Of course, mouse. You are my biggest treasure.)

DAISY
Danke, Süßer. Das wärmt.
(Thanks, sweetie. That warms my heart.)

HUSBAND
Komm her, Schnecke! Lass dich küssen.
(Come here, snail! Let me kiss you.)

DAISY
Schatzi! Doch nicht vor all Leuten!
(Darling! Not in front of all these people!)

4. Komplimente (compliments)

BRUNHILD to DOG
Du bist zuckersüß!
(You’re sweet as sugar!)

We certainly should shower our loved ones with compliments, like:

• Du bist zuckersüß! (You are adorable!)
• Du siehst wunderschön aus! (You look gorgeous!)
• Du bist so klug! (You are so wise!)
• Du bist einzigartig! (You are one of a kind!)

BRUNHILD to DOG
Du bist einzigartig!
(You’re on of a kind!)

5. Liebe macht blind (Loves makes blind)

Liebe macht blind (Love makes you blind) is a saying, you hear a lot when it comes to love. In the beginning of a relationship, people are said to be wearing eine rosarote Brille (rose-colored glasses) which is believed to cloud your vision.

YLVIE looking at a photo
Max ist einfach perfekt.
(Max is simply perfect.)

KIM
Niemand ist perfekt. Das wirkt nur so durch die rosarote Brille.
(Nobody is perfect. It just seems that way through the rose-colored glasses.)

What do you think? Macht Liebe blind? (Does love make you blind?)

6. Quiz about German love language

Einen Korb bekommen – what does that mean?

a) to receive a basket, you know, for mushroom collecting and stuff

b) to get rejected

Literally a) is correct, but we hardly ever use this phrase in a literal sense, so mostly b), to get rejected, is how this phrase is gonna be used. But a) would be a nice custom as well!

What am I saying to my baby when I say:

BRUNHILD to BABY
Du bist das Beste, was mir je passiert ist.

a) We need to change your diapers soon.

b) You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.

The correct answer is b), although surely both are true.

How do I tell my dog that she’s sweet as sugar?

a) Du bist so klug.

b) Du bist zuckersüß.

While “klug” means smart, zuckersüß means sweet as sugar, so b) is correct.

BRUNHILD to DOG
Du bist zuckersüß!
(You’re sweet as sugar!)

Now you know how to express your deepest feelings! Which is maybe not the first thing you wanna do. To test the waters, you may wanna start with some harmless flirting first!